How To Be Alone But Not Lonely

When I was young, I find distracting to be left alone. I have learned the ability to connect, and more so, I formed a different group of friends; at the school, at the neighborhood and all the social and religious organizations I have joined. I remember my introvert father’s complained every time I brought all these friends at home on my birthday or even on a holiday feast. When I was with people, I felt more energetic and happier, far from being lonely.

At some point in my life, I have experience being lonely and frustrated even when I have surrounded with friends and family members. I thought so many times what was wrong with me. And when I finally understood myself, I found the answer – I no longer waited for others to give me happiness. I could give it to myself.

It doesn’t mean I don’t need people anymore in my life now, no man is an island, and I still go out for fun with a group of friends.

I just learned to love myself first, and after that, I was able to manage to be alone and not feeling lonely. I realize we don’t have to depend on others to be happy. You can explore yourself, know what you’d like, know what makes you glad, support yourself. Try to do something that makes you proud of yourself, be comfortable in your own skin. Never expect anyone to fulfill your desire because when they don’t, loneliness would knock on your door again.

I am not an expert of being alone, but not lonely because I still have my moment. Yet, I started to enjoy my own company. I try to find solitude despite the hustle and bustle of everyday life. It helps me to deal with my relationship with others, giving me comfort to choose who’s the right people to stay in my life. I enjoy sitting alone in a room and being by myself, and I am pretty sure there is nothing wrong about it.

When I am alone, I could think. I could breathe. I could relax and recharge. I could talk to myself and that is fun.

“You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.”